Where have I been?

Things have been so nuts around here lately, I think I forgot I had a blog.  Honestly, when I went to log on here today - I had to THINK about how to get here! Sad, really.  After several inquiries as to where the HECK have I been, I thought I should post something to let you all know I am still alive.  :-)  Thanks for checking!!!

In the last month, I applied for, interviewed for and GOT a job.... that I wasn't sure I really even wanted.  I saw an ad in the local paper for a community-business type director (think chamber of commerce meets economic development), and I thought it sounded like a great job for me. Lots of action, people, challenge, hob-nobbing and autonomy.  I applied on a WHIM, thinking I'd never get it - when they called for an interview, I inquired about the flexibility - knowing off the bat juggling the family would be my biggest problem.  Vague answers, but sounded promising.  Hmmm okay.  I'd been in a bit of a 'rut' as far as staying home goes, and thought getting out of the house would do me some good... so I scheduled a time for the interview. After almost canceling twice, and Ben telling me to just go do it - i did.  The interview was a little nerve racking at first - hadn't been on that side of the table in a long, long time!  Four board members, including the City Planner sat across from me with their notebooks and questions, and took turns firing questions at me.  When they called the next week to tell me I was selected for the job, I was pretty surprised.  They were excited to have me, and I was pretty happy to be chosen, and I just went with it - I'd figure out the details later.  

Ben had said he could work from home two days per week, leaving only three to arrange daycare for Jacob - not too bad.  But how was our family going to handle this major transition? What about school inservices and sick days and SUMMER VACATION?  Hmmmm.  What about cooking and cleaning and laundry and all the 'house' stuff that would still need to be done around here?  What about the fact that Jacob can hardly be away from me for more than ONE HOUR without freaking out? What about when Ben has the week between Christmas and New Year's off - and I have to work? Bummer. What about after school care before I could get home? Ugh.

The more I thought and FRETTED over this job, the more it didn't make sense.  It's not like it paid a zillion dollars or anything - it was practically volunteer as far as I'm concerned.  And over the following week, I talked more to another board member and to the woman who previously held this position, and found out about all the City Council meetings, County Board meetings, Business after hours events, special events and CONFERENCES - all held after normal business hours - that I had to attend. Yikes. I also got a call AT HOME from a member wanting to talk to me about an upcoming event.  I hadn't even started yet!

Charlie all but cried when I told him I was taking a job.

What was I doing!?

Oh, and to make matters worse, stories were published about me in TWO newspapers - one featuring a big ol' picture of me - sent to every household in THE COUNTY.  I knew it was bad when the guy DRIVING A COMBINE outside asked me if I was 'that girl who took that job'.  Oh God. 

In the end - after losing a week's sleep over this - I made the call to bow out from the job I accepted. I felt like a total ASS, but I had to do it.  I had to!!!  If it was meant to be, I would have been excited, not agonizing over the opportunity.... even if it was the perfect job for me.... but just not NOW. Timing. Bah timing.

Anyway, that's all over now.  I'm trying to get back to the swing of things - including my bloggy self.  SO, here's to staying home!!!! :-)